


Kiss The Boy

by asunflowergarden



Series: If you want to kiss the boy [3]
Category: Love Simon (2018), Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda - Becky Albertalli
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bram's scared, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fear, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, IDGAF, Insecure Simon, Keiynan Lonsdale is a music god, M/M, Not a lot of plot tbh, Public Declarations of Love, Relationship Trouble, Yes the title is Kiss The Boy even though there's no kissing, it's 1 am but I had to give y'all some spierfeld, just angsty soft boys being angsty and soft, lonely Simon i guess, sorry that the summary for this one is so shitty, spierfeld, thanks for coming to my ted talk, you know the drill
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-17
Updated: 2018-07-17
Packaged: 2019-06-12 04:45:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,212
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15332067
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asunflowergarden/pseuds/asunflowergarden
Summary: Simon paused, sighing softly, "It's as though he's ashamed to be seen with me. You saw how he rejects my touch, how he barely looks at me anymore."-Bram distances himself from Simon because he's scared, hurting Simon in the process, before coming to the conclusion that he can't keep on living like this.





	Kiss The Boy

**Author's Note:**

> Writing just fluff is so two and a half weeks ago so I'm back on my semi-angsty bs, hope you enjoy
> 
>  
> 
> The title and the inspiration for this story came from Keiynan Lonsdale's (who plays Bram) beautiful song "Kiss The Boy", which you should definitely listen to

Bram had been distancing himself from Simon for weeks now, being careful not to be too obvious about it.

Simon had noticed the averted gazes, the rushed pecks on his cheek that only ever occurred if no one was watching and Bram otherwise avoiding skin contact altogether, but had thought little of it, and had told himself to remain calm.  
He had even tried talking to his boyfriend about it but every confrontation they had, had ended with Bram nervously chuckling and stating that he was 'fine' and Simon feeling completely idiotic for even bringing it up in the first place.

As Leah, Abby, Nick and Garrett joined the two by Bram's locker, Simon tried to put his arm around Bram's waist, as he had done countless of times before in their albeit short relationship, only to have him subtly sidestep out of the loving embrace.  
Simon glanced at Bram anxiously, nervously rubbing his left shoulder with the hand that was supposed to be resting on Bram's hip, feeling rejected and useless.  
As Nick continued to ramble about the dream he'd had that night, something regarding life underwater with only a coke bottle filled with air to breathe, Simon noticed Leah's gaze wandering from himself to Bram and back to himself, slowly sipping on her iced coffee, a worried frown edged on her face.

"Leah?", Simon whispered, taking Leah's hand in his and pulling her away from the group, thankful for her allowing him to touch her, when his boyfriend so obviously wouldn't, "Can I talk to you for a second?"  
"Sure thing", she answered, and once Simon had pulled both of them out of earshot, so that their friends couldn't hear them, she asked, "What's up with you and Bram?"  
"I think he's gonna break up with me.", Simon forced out as Leah choked on her drink, little droplets of coffee dribbling down her chin.  
"I'm sorry", Leah coughed and tried to catch her breath at the same time, insistently wiping at her chin, "Bram's gonna do what now?"  
"You know it's true Leah", Simon averted his gaze, his eyes watering, "He's been distant for weeks, we barely talk, we never touch in public."  
Simon paused, sighing softly, "It's as though he's ashamed to be seen with me. You saw how he rejects my touch, how he barely looks at me anymore."  
Leah breathed in deeply, anger rising within her, "Has he said anything?", she asked, lifting an eyebrow in question.  
Simon shook his head sadly, "Maybe", he began, his eyes watering ever so slightly, "Maybe I'm just not good enough, you know.", he hung his head, rubbing his hands together, "Maybe he wanted Jacques to be someone else, someone handsome, someone smart."  
"Simon, you know that's not true, you know you're-", Leah began before she was promptly interrupted by the person they were talking about in the first place.

"What's not true?", Bram, who had wandered over to them, asked, a casual smile grazing his face.  
Said smile fell however, as soon as he saw Simon turning away from him to rapidly wipe the tears from his cheeks.  
"Are you okay, Si?", Bram asked, concern lacing his voice.  
Leah smiled at Simon one last time before excusing herself from the conversation, deciding to leave the both of them to exchange words long overdue.

Simon turned to Bram, gnawing at his lips nervously, meeting his eyes for a second before averting his gaze to stare intently at his sneakers.  
"Just get it over with already.", Simon mumbled, anxiously scratching the palm of his hand, leaving angry red lines in his wake.  
"What are you talking about?", Bram questioned, both confused and concerned because of the way Simon was acting.  
Bram could feel his boyfriend holding his breath, face tense and eyebrows drawn together, before their gazes met and he choked out a strained "I know you want to break up with me.", his chest heaving heavily afterwards.

Simon's outburst left Bram speechless, mouth hanging open ever so slightly, his expression filled with both guilt and sorrow.  
Simon rubbed a hand down his face before running it through his hair nervously, spiking it up before smoothing it down again, "You've been so distant lately and avoiding me and I get it, I do, you're disappointed that it's me and you didn't want to say anything probably because you didn't want to hurt my feelings but I get it, I really do, I understand if you don't want to be with me.", he rambled, gesturing wildly, tears gathering in his eyes once again, his lips quivering softly.

Bram, teary-eyed himself, softly placed his hand on Simon's shoulder, pulling him in for a hug and Simon just fell into Bram's arms, all fight and strain leaving his body, a small sob escaping his throat.  
He felt Bram holding onto him for dear life, felt him placing a gentle kiss on his cheek and breathing out a soft "I love you, Simon.", desperation and guilt tainting his words.  
They hadn't used the l-word around each other before and thus Simon gasped, fingers digging into his boyfriend's shirt, tears already beginning to stain it, the students surrounding them and the rest of the world forgotten within their embrace.

As they loosened their hug Simon lifted his head from Bram's shoulder and caught his gaze and he couldn't help quietly asking "Why have you been avoiding me?", his expression confused and still slightly hurt.  
"I don't know, Si. I guess I was scared. Scared to show how I truly feel about you.", Bram answered, breathing shakily, "People talk, Simon and I guess I just didn't want us to be something they talked about. I tried so hard to not let them ruin our relationship that I almost ruined it myself.", he let out a breathy laugh that didn't convey any happiness.  
"I can't keep doing this.", Bram whispered to himself, stepping out of their embrace and taking a couple of steps away from him, leaving Simon feeling anxious and scared once again, "I can't keep hiding you away.", he declared, turning away from his boyfriend.

"Everybody, listen up! I have something I want to confess!", Bram shouted at the busy hallway, hands cupped around his mouth, a mixture of fear and excitement glinting in his eyes.  
The soft buzz of students quieted down as the people surrounding them stopped what they were doing to stare at them intently.  
Bram looked back at Simon quickly, before turning back around to face the mass of students surrounding them, "My name is Bram Greenfeld and I'm hopelessly in love with Simon Spier!", he walked backwards until he stood next to Simon, entwining their hands before lifting them above their heads proudly, "You may now all resume your previous activities."  
The circle broke apart rather quickly, some people annoyed at having their time wasted, others smiling softly at the two of them and Nick, Leah, Abby and Garrett cheering from where they were standing some feet away.

Bram glanced at Simon, who was smiling around tears, a loving expression taking over his face. "I love you, too, Bram.", Simon told him and Bram smiled so wide his cheeks hurt, warmth spreading throughout his entire body and contentment taking over his heart.

**Author's Note:**

> Took me a while (mainly because I had a two week internship at a hospital where I had to get up at around 4 am everyday so that kept me quite busy) but here's another Spierfeld one-shot
> 
> Btw, if anyone wants to proofread my stories in the future, hmu
> 
> And if anyone has any fluffy or angsty prompts for me, hmu aswell
> 
> And thanks to everyone that reads and enjoys my stories!


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